I may be biased, (okay, I am totally biased,) but it is my humble opinion that your wedding ceremony should be 100% reflective of you and your partner's personality, values, worldview, and everything that makes your relationship special and unique.
There are many ways to personalize your ceremony to reflect who you are and what you believe.
When I collaborate with couples to design their wedding ceremony, I divide these ways into 4 categories.
Declaration of Intent - the “I do” - Many couples say “I do,” to a standardized set of declarations - “Do you, _____ take ____ as your lawfully wedded partner….” The point of this part of the ceremony is to declare that you are a willing participant in this ceremony. Instead of just agreeing to the basics, couples can create personalized intention statements that take this agreement to marry a step further, and agree to the intentions of the marriage as well.
Blessings, Readings, & Prayers
Throughout the ceremony, couples will often include a reading or a prayer. I encourage couples to really be selective about this reading and make sure it’s something that either means something to them or really evokes the sentiment they are seeking to experience.
Bonus points go to those who invite a beloved family member to come up and read. Make it extra special.
A fun twist on this is playing a song or singing, if that is your thing!
The Unity Ceremony is where we create a visual representation of the emotional joining that is taking place. There are many options available and often couples simply don’t know what is out there.
Things have come a long way from the Unity Candle! Branch out!
One unique version of this is a Tree Planting ceremony, where we take soil from the two childhood homes of the partners and use it to plant a tree together. You can do Coffee Bean blending, Wine blending, Bourbon blending, and my favorite, Signature Cocktail blending are all other versions of this ceremony.
Make it PERSONAL!!
This is the one point in the ceremony where couples take the mic and have an opportunity to speak directly to their beloved in a way that doesn’t happen during the rest of the repeat-after-me ceremony.
I HIGHLY encourage my couples to write their own vows and I provide a framework to keep them focused on the fact that they are not just telling a story - but declaring their promises for the many years to come.
Even if your faith system does not allow for you to read your own personal wedding vows during your wedding ceremony, I highly encourage you to spend the time to write your own personal wedding vows with your specific promises to your best friend.
Not sure where to start with your wedding vows?
Download my How to Vow Roadmap and get going!